(Reuters) – Late-night TV comedian Jimmy Kimmel admits he is anxious about headlining his first White
House Correspondents Dinner this coming Saturday, and his self-confessed lack of insight into Washington doesn’t help calm
his nerves.
next to a cake during a celebration for the 125th anniversary of the City of Hollywood in Hollywood, California February 1,
2012. REUTERS/Mario Anzuoni
The star of ABC’s “Jimmy Kimmel Live!” told Reuters
his interest in politics is roughly equal to his interest in sports — and in reality TV star Kim Kardashian.
But
Kimmel is playing to comic effect. When prodded, he unleashes his wit on Washington’s most powerful lawmakers who provide no
shortage of good material for him and his writers.
“I will feast on stupid comments,” Kimmel said with glee about his
upcoming gig, noting that out on the campaign trail “there seems to be a glut of dumb things being said.”
His take on
Newt Gingrich is that the lagging Republican presidential hopeful is “really on a pie-tasting tour of the United States.”
Former candidate Herman Cain should be the vice president nominee because his pizza-making days provide the grist for great
comedy.
The Brooklyn-born, Las Vegas-raised Kimmel may make as much fun of himself as he will of those in the elite
audience of media stars, political powerbrokers and Hollywood celebrities. After all, he was fired from four radio stations
and got into show business simply to become a friend of David Letterman.
To calm his nerves, he writes jokes, and his
hope is to have a “nice mixture of prepared and off-the-cuff comedy” for the black tie gala. Here are a few hints of the
ammunition is in his joke holster:
* On presumptive Republican presidential nominee Mitt Romney: “Mitt Romney looks
like a Sears catalog model.”
* On former candidate Rick Santorum: “I am fascinated by Rick Santorum … and the array
of things he’s fighting for. Why bring pornography into it? What does that have to do with running for the White House? You
are losing the male vote basically by going against pornography.”
* On former candidate for vice president Sarah
Palin: “Now she is stationed up in Alaska all the time, she doesn’t have a professional hair or makeup artist any more, she
is starting to look like a mom on ‘Toddlers and Tiaras’. Her hair looks like bees are doing it for her.”
* On his
picks for Republican VP: “Herman Cain is a lot of fun and the pizza angle is an endless fountain of comedy. (Rapper) Flavor
Flav would be great … Chris Christie, who seems to gain 10 pounds every time I see him, would be a great vice
president.”
* On Supreme Court Justice Antonin Scalia: “Under that robe, Justice Scalia is an Italian guy. He’s had
his balls busted for probably his whole life by his family.”
* On President Barack Obama: “If I was filling out a
bracket, my bet would be that he would win.”
JAY CARNEY ’14-YEARS-OLD’
Obama, who precedes Kimmel in the
night’s comedy line-up, might not get skewered so much, but not because Kimmel will pull punches. He gets a thrill from
making fun of people to their faces.
“It’s hard to make fun of Obama in general because he’s a cool character,”
Kimmel said. “Outside of his ears, there’s not a whole lot.”
But Obama’s recent open mic goof with Russian leader
Dmitry Medvedev might lend itself to roasting. And Washington always dishes up its share of scandals that provide rich
material. Last year, it was demands that Obama produce his birth certificate. This year, it could be sex and the Secret
Service or the lavish Las Vegas bash held by the General Services Administration.
Kimmel finds humor in Washington
rituals, including press briefings with White House spokesman Jay Carney. “He is only 14-years-old, so you have to take that
into account,” Kimmel said.
On the White House press briefing itself, Kimmel said: “I have a feeling it will be
entirely different 20 years from now and people will be flour bombing the president.”
Kimmel has the material, but
there are other worries on his mind, like whether people will be eating while he performs (“people do not laugh or clap while
they are eating”) or trying to match the success of last year’s headliner Seth Meyers (“I wish I was on the year after Rich
Little”).
And then there is the problem of finding chemistry with an audience more interested in schmoozing with each
other than, perhaps, listening to a Hollywood comedian.
The challenge is more daunting to Kimmel than his other big
gig of the year, the television industry’s Emmy Awards.
“I go into these situations with a lot of optimism, thinking
that people have a great sense of humor, and then I am almost always surprised that they didn’t afterwards,” said
Kimmel.
“But it’s better to go in blindly with a big smile on your face and come out trembling.”
(Reporting By
Mary Milliken; Editing by Bob
Tourtellotte)